Sex vs. Heroin

Posted Mar 28, 2007 15 comments

heroin bathroom addict shooting up needleI know, I know—hard to call it, huh? Genital stimulation culminating in orgasm....or injecting a potentially fatal liquid into your veins in a bathroom somewhere?  This is gonna be a tough one, but bear with me.  We will get to the bottom of this.  The root of the problem is neurology, because it’s looking like the classic rehab poetry about heroin being like the greatest orgasm you ever had, dude, ever is factually true. 

In the article on Toxoplasmosis—the cat-shit parasite that controls the human race —I sort of almost started to touch on a substance called dopamine.  Dopamine is a hormone, and it’s one of the single most important substances known to mankind.  Or something.


brain power sex neurologyNeurology gets re-written completely every few years, and this will not change—if anything it will accelerate.  There’s too much we don’t know, and too many researchers all over the world uncovered mystifying and contradictory new data every day.  Of course, I’ve never let reality interfere with my writing before...why start now?

Even after several dozen total revisions and paradigm shifts, dopamine will still be one of the single most important chemicals in the human body.  Anything I can write about the brain is an oversimplification, but dopamine is so integral it can be simplified honestly, for example: dopamine is the pleasure drug the brain uses to reward behavior. Way too basic, sure, but still fundamentally true.  (Unlike saying ”the pineal gland is the crazy hippie of the brain family,” for example.)

According to our marketing research, most Hump Jones readers are under 30—born into the era of information overload, where knowledge simply exists.  Sure, dopamine is a central component of how the human organism works, and we know that because it’s in Wikipedia.  But how did humans figure that out in the first place? 

Let’s Just Torture Animals

Tantra, just like meditation and ritual magick, are recipes that anyone can cook at home and get results from.  The problem is this: after the Pineal Gland Apocalypse dies down and you’re trying to tell someone about your experience—the white light, the feelings of connection with every conscious thing in the Universe, and the realization everything in the Universe is conscious—they usually have no reference points to evaluate what you’re saying. 

An even better example would be a smoking a bowl of Salvia Divinorum—sure, you left the room and got mind-raped by Shakti herself, but nobody who was with you saw that happen.  They just watched you twitch on the sofa for about 30 seconds.

lab ratSo in order for science to get “hard data” about sexuality and the biology, neurochemistry and good old physics behind it, they’ve mostly resorted to torturing animals.  With non-human subjects, a scientist can do all sorts of stuff they could never get away with in humans...well, that’s not true at all.  All the horrible “Nazi doctors” you hear about actually wound up getting very high-paying jobs with the US Government, mostly the the military, after World War Two, and if that sounds crazy, you should learn your history.  Doing horrible things to humans can actually be quite a profitable career move.

Let’s put it this way: with lab rats, you can legally torture living creatures and still be able to talk about your work at dinner parties. 

“Well, we saw open the skulls of about a dozen rats at time and wire electrodes directly into various regions of their brains, then attach a remote transmitter to their heads and observe how their behavior changes when we zap them.”

“Oh, Richard, that’s fascinating.”

...or something.  Obviously, I’ve never been invited to a dinner party and I’m a little bitter about it.  Jose Delgado is a pioneer in the the field of High-Precision Butchery, and his work on Electronic Stimulation of the Brain is worth considering, if we’re gonna understand dopamine.  (We’ve also got a copy of his entire “infamous” book “Towards a Psychocivilized Society” over at Skilluminati Research.)

Jose Delgado is notable because he did in fact cut people’s skulls open and run electrodes into their brains and take notes on what happened.  He got paid very well for that, made himself a name in the scientific community, and retired to Madrid, where’s he still living comfortably today.

The first case was V.P., a 36-year-old female with a long history of epileptic attacks which could not be controlled by medication. Electrodes were implanted in her right temporal lobe and upon stimulation of a contact located in the superior part about thirty millimeters below the surface, the patient reported a pleasant tingling sensation in the left side of her body “from my face down to the bottom of my legs.” She started giggling and making funny comments, stating that she enjoyed the sensation “very much.”

Get Off Your Judgmental Trip, Bro

lab rat head wires experimentBesides, should we really get all down on heroin?  Isn’t that kind of a trendy position to take? It was good enough for Jimi Hendrix, so what’s wrong with you?  Get hip.  It’s called Heroin Chic, which is a trojan horse for necro-porn, which will be mainstream in less than a decade.  Once Switzerland admits it’s been cloning humans for obscenely wealthy anonymous clients, you’re going to wake up in a much different world.  Don’t panic, though: you’ve been there all along.

It’s a disturbingly reductive thing to say—but if you believe the evidence, all of the fetishes and philias we explore here, all of the 6 billion variations on the myth of Normal Sexuality, it’s all just the result of dopamine, huh?  The importance of this stuff—which is available in powder form under the brand names “cocaine” and “heroin”—cannot be overstated.  Observe this summary of lab rat dopamine research from the excellent site Reuniting:

Researchers placed electrodes in rats’ reward centers to stimulate them, just as dopamine does. The rats could then press a lever to stimulate the reward center. That’s all those rats did; rat pushing lever...they ignored food, and even female rats. They just sat there pressing the lever over and over, wasting away…not unlike crack addicts. In a second experiment, scientists blocked dopamine so the reward center could not be stimulated. What happened? The rats just sat there, again ignoring food, receptive mates, and the opportunity to explore their environment.

So how come sex addicts are unhappy?  How do fat people get depressed? Why do heroin users ever come down?  Most crucially of all, why aren’t humans having sex in the streets like God intended? The brain has a built-in regulation system which may or may not be the source of all human suffering.  (Specifically, according to me, it is, and according to “Science”, it’s make the call.) That regulation system is built around the hormone called Prolactin, which sounds like a hemmorhoid cream but actually isn’t.  We’ll explore the dark side of feeling good tomorrow. (The next part)

Filed in:

Next entry: Prolactin: Proof That God Hates Us

Previous Entry: Slow. Down. Cowboy.


Sorry, but the comments for this entry have expired.

  • 1. pars on Mar 28, 2007 at 11:47 AM permalink

    i like what you’re getting at hump, i’m really glad you exist.

  • 2. George on Mar 28, 2007 at 11:52 AM permalink

    "Mind-raped by Shakti herself”, had me cracking up. Sometimes, your writings bring back total experiences...or hallucinations.

  • 3. JO on Mar 28, 2007 at 12:35 PM permalink

    dude, people dont have dinner parties anymore unless they are from an old money family.

  • 4. Rza on Mar 28, 2007 at 2:54 PM permalink

    I’m sure sex addicts are quite happy when they’re fucking.

  • 5. Sage on Mar 28, 2007 at 10:13 PM permalink

    "They usually have no reference points to evaluate what you’re saying.”

    Well that isn’t entirely true...there is always quantum mechanics and metaphysics. People are just closed minded and/or lazy.

    Or better yet, you could bring up more stuff on their own neurology...yup it’s always fun in the wacky world of neuroscience…

    What with all the oxytocin, serotonin, melatonin, dmt, endogenous opioids and such flying around in our own heads I am amazed people even take drugs…

    Ah well, it’s not like anything is real anyway.
    *cough*prolactin = tiredness after orgasm*cough*

  • 6. Lee Soarez on Mar 29, 2007 at 6:51 AM permalink

    Fuck! My fingers are sore from addin’ links to favorites over here, dog..
    Like I have said before.. the wording, cuz.. the wordin’!
    words like knives.. fresh-new ones..
    I’mma stop thanking ya’.. U know i always mean to! to part II now! c ya’ there!


  • 7. Senator Knee Hi on Mar 29, 2007 at 8:50 AM permalink

    Bullshit, Hump. You know full well that I’ve invited you to any number of awkward, drunken soirees chez moi. Tell me, is it the self-congratulating intellectualism or the self-important secularism that’s keeping you away? Do you not like my glass menagerie?

  • 8. Humpasaur Jones on Mar 29, 2007 at 10:07 AM permalink

    Transportation, yo.  It really is that simple, come get me and I’ll have dinner anytime.

  • 9. Natalie on Mar 29, 2007 at 10:25 AM permalink

    I don’t really understand the “Sex vs. Heroin” theme/title of this piece. I understand the common denominator is dopamine. But are you suggesting people have to choose either sex or heroin to enjoy increased dopamine levels? Is this all about pleasure centers in the brain, and what makes a person choose a certain type of stimulation?

  • 10. James on Mar 29, 2007 at 1:08 PM permalink

    why aren’t people having sex in the streets like god intended them to do?

    Oh it happens!  You just haven’t been in the right place at the right time, baby.

  • 11. Shelley on Mar 30, 2007 at 1:23 AM permalink

    i was a nymphomaniac and a heroin / crack addict - lol. a nympho first, and from an extremely early age. i can tell you from my experience that my cravings were for being filled to splitting point (when i wasn’t being filled i felt empty and sooo needing my next shag). In addition to needing to be filled was the need to be degraded, humiliated, used and hurt hard. Even now it excites me to no end each time this creeps into my thoughts. I had even gotten to the stage of allowing men to carry out their most degrading sick fantasies, including a strange incident involving a dog after being tied up - this was one of those instances that one gets into without wanting it but due to being too risky. Another strange incident involved doing a sadists bidding with unwilling women. but, back to the point of this comment, i seldom reached orgasm whilst i was in the beginning and most frantic stage of my nymphomania, it was more about the craving and the need - as with heroin addiction. only as i became more discerning did i enjoy sex, and progressed with strange and more extreme encounters. I have always compared sex and drug abuse, and often used the two together. i think the connection is obvious to users.

  • 12. Duality Rules on Mar 31, 2007 at 3:31 PM permalink

    Sorry to rain on your parade, Hump, but a wily Canadian researcher came up with another rat experiment in which the rats refused heroin, basically a much friendlier environment, in which the rats had more space and social opportunities.

    We (and rats) are not slaves of pleasure, since it turns out we can manufacture our own.

  • 13. Humpasaur Jones on Mar 31, 2007 at 4:41 PM permalink

    Clearly you had no idea what parade you were at, my friend.  Welcome to the party.

  • 14. ness on Apr 01, 2007 at 5:56 PM permalink

    uhh making us wait for our fix tomorro ey? i want to know now!

  • 15. Humpasaur Jones on Apr 01, 2007 at 7:58 PM permalink

    Dude, it’s already up!  It’s been up for days now.