Humpjones

Hump Jones: The Lost Interview

Posted Aug 22, 2011

So I did this centuries ago and never worried much about it...until I realized it had been many months and the interview still wasn’t published. I contacted The Blogger In Question and got stonewalled for a few weeks, then told flat-out I was being disrespectful and it would never be posted. I’m okay with that and I won’t even name who it was: we all have our own parameters for personal space and basic respect and I’ve offended a lot of people. I’ve had bad days, too: no harm, no foul.

Just the same, though? I do have a problem with the reason it’s not being run: hip hop blogs cater to a bored and boring demographic with no background knowledge about anything outside of pop culture. So yeah, I get it, but I ain’t cool with it—therefore, I’m gonna run the interview here.

Was Humpasaur Jones a release from the conscious rap of Wombaticus Rex?

Well, it’s a bummer that you’d think of Wombaticus Rex as conscious rap. We were hippies and all but we were also very stupid, and on a tremendous amount of interesting drugs. Social causes had nothing to do with our music, we were jamming with a live band for most of the shows and we aimed to entertain. Me and Chris Dizzy were blacked out for years at a stretch, so calling us “conscious rap” is pretty funny, you know?

What are your goals for Breakup Music?

I want to be taken seriously. Specifically, I want to be taken seriously as Hump Jones, which is a ridiculous sex rap bullshit side project. So we’ve made this huge cinematic and brutal album and wasted three years obsessing over every second of it. We want to make tons of money off this so we can stop going broke every time we tour, and we want it to stand as one of the best sex rap albums ever...or at least, one of the most ambitious.

Why do you use so many names for your work?

I was fascinated with Kool Keith as a kid, but really, the answer traces back to the circumstances of my birth. In the United States that day, there was a rash of bizarre abduction attempts where clowns in white vans tried to “kidnap” children, but in such an overtly threatening and non-committal way that the kids were terrified and ran away to promptly report this. There’s been a lot of urban legends and hysteria around the Kidnapper Van concept, but it traces to this actual event, which is even stranger because it happened in multiple cities on the East Coast.  Why was there a coordinated attempt like this? It was ritual theater, an occult celebration of the fact that meanwhile, across the Atlantic, the IRA activist Bobby Sands was finally dying of his hunger strike at Long Kesh prison. Sands was promptly reincarnated as yours truly, and I’ve grown up with constant background paranoia and a keen awareness of how eager most of humanity is to burn new ideas to death rather than think too hard about anything. Those are the basic factors that inform my approach to marketing hip hop music.

Do you think the music business is different now than it was 5 years ago?

Maybe a little bit, probably. I don’t really keep up with that stuff too much, I’m too busy smoking blunts and doing cocaine with Jimmy Iovine, you know? As a music recording artist, I’m fortunate enough to be insulated from the grim realities that independent artists might be facing. World Around is obviously a multinational operation so my life is one big expense account.

Who are your biggest influences?

Thanks for not asking who my favorite rappers are! I’d say Kurt Vonnegut Jr, Jacques Vallee, Grace “Detroit” Boggs, Doug Henwood, Henry Okah, Lee Atwater, Timothy Leary, Jeff Vail, Grant Morrison, Hakim Bey, John Tayler Gatto, Oliver Reiser, Willis Harman, Marvin Minsky, Jeff Wells, and definitely, Marshall McLuhan. That guy has probably shaped me far too much for my own good. I am also indebted to Robert Anton Wilson for completely ruining my life by enlightening me before I was even done with adolescence, sending me into a decade-long God-Child downward spiral of LULZ and pain.

What do you think of renegade rappers Odd Future?

Nothing expresses the sheer potential of the human species quite like rapping about “raping pregnant bitches” over fruity loops masterpieces. I’m really glad I didn’t blow up when I was 18 because I was dumb and I didn’t have shit to say.

What do you think of V-Nasty?

Whatever it is, that shit sounds painful.

So you don’t like much new hip hop?

Quite the contrary, daug. My “2011 ill shit” folder, which is where I throw a copy of every single track I’ve liked this year, has 121 files in it. That’s a lot of new hip hop that I like, enjoy, bump on a regular basis. I’d say there is more good hip hop coming out, right now, than there ever has been. People are quick to mix up What Corporate America is Promoting with the actual culture and music of hip hop. They are utterly different concepts.

We’re living right now in the harvest of Reaganomics, with a completely hollowed out economic system, a dying military empire, and an education system that’s designed to fail us. That’s why Waka Flocka Flame happens: we’ve got a generation that doesn’t know shit about shit and they’re proud of that. I’m not talking about race or class here, I’m just talking about national demographics in the United States. Reach into the hat full of 300+ million names and grab yourself an Average American...no matter what color their skin is, no matter what God they worship, odds are very strong that they’re going to be a fucking idiot, by any objective standard. That’s the problem. Ignorance is an existential threat to our species.

So I’m not one of these cats who will sit around asking rhetorical questions. I know why rap sucks in 2011, just like I know why our political process is broken and our currency is taking a beating, too. If you pay attention to reality it gets a lot less mysterious.

What is it like to work with World Around Records?

Unfortunately, I’m one of the people in charge, so I’m really only on the label because I’ve got the hook up. It’s shameful, really, that they’d allow such low-grade crap to sully their back catalog just because they’re too nice to say anything about my quality control problems. Fucking hippies are all the same: cowards and stoners, right down to the last girly-man.

So what’s it like to work with them? Basically, imagine a part-time job that pays $0 an hour, but you can’t quit because you’re friends with everyone there and worse yet, you actually drank the Kool Aid and believe in the whole doomed vanity project. In other words, it’s a mental illness and until my family and friends intervene, this is only going to get worse from here.

What touring artist would like to get on the road with in 2012?

Probably Witness or That Handsome Devil. In 2012, I’d like to see a World Around package tour going by then, but it’s weird to say you only want to play with yourself, isn’t it? I like acts with live bands, I like artists who approach hip hop from a personal angle. For sheer comedy value, though, I’d never turn down a totally inappropriate and doomed opportunity like opening for Skid Row or M.O.P. or whoever that V-Nasty guy is.

What producer would you most like to work with?

Dr. Dre, becuase I want my career to end as soon as possible. For the most part, I’m done with producers. I already work with a crew of prolific and talented cats with similar aesthetic taste, so why fuck around with “networking” for it’s own sake? 2011 has been all about un-learning pretty much everything I talked about on Audible Hype. I take the music business way less seriously—not coincidentally, I get a shitload more work done now, too.

Any shout outs?

Yes, definitely. Jiddu Krishnamurti, Willie Green, and Owsley Stanley. Louis Mackey is the reason the phrase “criminally slept on” exists, but nobody realizes that yet. Man Mantis is gonna be on tour all Fall and you have gotta go see that shit. Also, catch Witness if he comes through your town: he’s got a live band that melts faces and the best hour set you’ll see from a rapper this year.

Book An Interview You Have the Courage to Publish:

Filed in: The Music

Sex: The Secret Gate to Eden

Posted Aug 02, 2011

No LULZ here, but I did find this a pretty fascinating treatment of the topic, and since it was embeddable, I had to share this. I’m not saying this is all true, but I’m urging you to sit back, relax and take a ride through a very educational, thought-provoking reality tunnel.

Thoughts? Suggestions? Detailed Feminist Critiques?

Filed in: The War on Sex

Happy 4th of July from No Humans Allowed

Posted Jul 03, 2011

This is our love song to a dying empire. Since we released No Humans Allowed back on May 5th of this year, the final track on the album is the one I get the most emails about. (This is a pattern for me.)

“Good Night, America” is about the fact that it’s all downhill from here for residents of the United States. Lou’s verse is driven by his daily work routine in the lap of high finance luxury, and my verse was driven by the hippies who think I’m down with their anemic little ”cause.” We have no sympathy, no mercy and even less patience. You are in a burning house. Act accordingly.

“Good Night, America” Lyrics

(Thirtyseven)
I can make the case for euthanasia to a room of strangers
...not just convincing them, convincing them to do it later
you’re saying life is beautiful but you’re a stupid hater
I’m basing that on basic math that you can prove on paper
…I can set the weapons on the stage and walk away
you can’t direct improvisation, you’ve just gotta pray
but you can bet this modern age has gotta pop someday
and you don’t even wanna contemplate the way this all relates
...and I can see that we’ve been freaking you out
shoulders up, little stoner stuck deep in the couch
you cobra clutch social drugs to keep people around
but you know it’s a joke and they see through it now, ouch…
I can bet that we do not agree for lots of reasons…
won’t matter when we’ve lost our heat and crops are freezing
won’t matter when you’ve gotta keep your Mom from screaming
cuz she’s watching zombies feeding off her daughter’s body pieces

(Louis Mackey)
I wonder… does the strain end in this vicious maze?
we’re all seeing under the same lens with different shades
it’s a shame, when we’re hollow and done...to sit and wait
for the sickle blade to swallow us up, and hit the grave
pain’s deep, probably smothered out your faint dreams
wake, sleep, walking up and down the same street
going manic with this same shit, I can’t obey the matrix
frozen fabric in space, moving animated faces
rabid mannequins standing in a straight line
its hard to handle this and exist at the same time
...I pass by the old theater, stuck in the rain
they’re grippin’ cups for our change, I act like I don’t see em’
though it’s getting dark, I handle my payload
...swim with sharks, dance with the angels
and I’ve made it far to see the ease with which
saints get shot, thieves get rich…

Filed in: The Music

The Road To Madison: Day 2

Posted Jun 21, 2011

Algorhythms Hip Hop

I spent the morning working on a long, unhealthy breakfast and some Algorhythms promotion. We’re still booking shows and waiting on some artwork, but hot damn, we’ve gotta start making noise about these shows ASAP, right? So we dropped a new track for that precise reason:

Algorhythms - Love is Supreme

The practice session last night was fucking epic. We honed the set to completion and ran through it three times, getting progressively more smash-brained until about midnight, at which point we watched Enter the Void and a BBC Documentary about the Westboro Baptist Church. This inspired us to do a lot more drugs and run through the set at 3 am, this time with a video projector. That was a good call.

Today, we’ll be laying out a custom video file in Vegas so that our entire set will be Visually Co-ordinated™ into a brainwash orgasm. This is exactly the kind of next-level stunt that I have come to expect from DJ Multiple Sex Partners, and we’re just getting started here...only a Tuesday, folks.

Side note: Paz de la Huerta makes me salivate uncontrollably.

The question remains: how can the bar be raised further? Opening for an act as intensely weird as Star Persons demands nothing less than Facemelter Status™ performances. Mere visuals won’t be enough—we are essentially engineering a psychotronic manipulation vortex using only crude 21st century technology.

Fortunately, we have the training for situations like this...stay tuned.

Filed in: The Music

The Road To Madison: Day 1

Posted Jun 20, 2011

Hello, dear friends.

It’s been a long, mostly illegal 30 years since I released my first single on Motown Records and accidentally birthed the greatest subgenre that music has ever known: psychedelic sex rap. I spent years in obscurity before my career finally exploded into the mildly unknown, marginal success story that changed my life forever.

Today, like most days, I find myself half-naked and hard at work on a dozen projects at once. From the secret Wombaticus Rex album to the masterpiece monolith that is Breakup Music...from the hippie horseshit known as Algorhythms to assembling the 10,000 moving parts for the fall season of the Vs. Series...I am stoopid grateful to be working on music full time. That is directly because of fans and donors and patrons and secret controllers from around the world. You will all get credited when the movie comes out, rest assured.

I got pumped up this morning thanks to a Wrecking Crew track you should probably hear immediately. Has-Lo, Zilla Rocca and Curly Castro beast the shit out of this track and it’s in the triple digits on replays here a World Around Central.

The Road to Madison: Day 1

Today, like most days, I find myself sipping fresh coffee and designing a set for my next gig. I’m camped out with DJ Multiple Sex Partners and we’re prepping for a show next Saturday in Madison, Wisconsin. All praise due to Man Mantis.

The event page for the gig is pretty priceless: “Humpasaur Jones of Illinois will also open, with his alternative hip hop sound.” Man, did we get a kick out of that one. They nailed me: I’m basically a mix between PM Dawn and Arrested Development. Fortunately, the Madison A/V Club didn’t do me dirty at all me and I’m thankful for the coverage: “Joining in the fun here...Chicago hip-hop anomaly Humpasaur Jones, who belies his goofy name with serious rhymes on “Funeral Groupies.”

Being able to debut in a new city by opening up for some of their best artists (Star Persons and K. Raydio #daug) at one of their best venues is a serious opportunity, so we’re making the most clockwork, sex-tastic, and Space Funking possible set for the party people. Inspired by Dr. Quandary‘s endless experiments with Live Bloggery, as well as corporate transparency initiatives from World Around, I’m going to document the process here on Hump Jones Dot Com.

...but, uh...let’s start tomorrow, okay? This is already too long and I need to sit out on the back porch and take some bong rips. You folks take care of yourselves, and make sure you get in an orgasm today by any means necessary. Do it for me. Do it for yourself. Do it for the whole world.

Filed in: Zeitgeist

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